Christmas Quiz Quandries – 18 December 2019

Coffee beans on the left, books on the right. Yes, this year’s annual Christmas quiz took place, as it always does, in the writer’s safest place: Waterstones. Once the initial flurry of ‘Are you feeling Christmassy yet?’ had abated, we were informed on Waterstones’s best selling books. Had I written this blog sooner, now would follow a detailed list of what those books were. Unfortunately, this will not be the case, as I suffer from a disorder which resets my memory every four days (don’t ask me about it, though – naturally, I won’t know what you’re talking about). Instead, I will give you the rundown as if I were a serial procrastinator who put off writing this blog for a fortnight (but, again, I should stress that that was not the case): the people of Ayrshire enjoy Billy Connolly, and they also enjoy football.

Following these unexpected and quite simply harrowing revelations, we moved on to the quiz, during which each group scrambled for the answers to questions on literature, music, and theme tunes. The quiz progressed like most pub quizzes do, only with a little more festive cheer. Scanning the room (which I didn’t do personally, but someone must have), all the usual trivia night casualties could be observed: the answer springs to your mind but for some reason you refrain from saying it aloud, meaning it will most certainly end up being right, and you’ll say ‘Oh, I was going to say that!’, but you didn’t. You didn’t say it.

Now and again you’ll grow embarrassed by how poor your general knowledge must seem (and is), so when someone says an answer they sound sure of, you say ‘yeah’ and repeat it as if you just thought of it as well. Obviously this is a risk, because the person whose answer you’ve just wholeheartedly agreed with could immediately retract their suggestion and say ‘ah, no, of course it’s not that.’ Or, even worse, they could chuckle and admit that they were ‘just kidding’, in which case the only viable option is to get up, walk out of the building, and never speak to anyone in the room ever again.

Luckily I was only aware of this happening to six people throughout the course of the quiz, and because the overall turnout was otherwise great, Christmas cheer remained unharmed.

See you next December, Waterstones.


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